The Crime

The feeling when you compare your productivity, curiosity and energy with yourself. Missing the beautiful days when my mind used to be so much active, and wanted to do something or other every second. Now I am just getting tired by doing bare minimum. I miss the energy. I miss the curious mind. How it used to just hunt something interesting to do. I am also tired of being this unproductive. It’s been months now. I already have a project in hand. Working on the same. But that just doesn’t satisfy me anymore. It’s just an earning source. I do have a lot of ideas to create, to present, to strategise, to execute. But I am just not able to express it to myself.

I feel like I am getting late to catch the train
Just half a minute late
I am running,
Checking the time,
Moving everyone aside with the hardest abuses

I am just there at the platform.
The train is in front of me,
Standing steady,
Without any crowd,
And I am still not able to catch it.

A lady stares at me
While hanging at the door
And I am just looking at her
Thinking of her gender
Her hanging boobs looks perfect
For her to be a lady.

And another woman in saree
Catches me staring at the boobs
With her big maroon bindi
While selling Bakarwadi and Butter Chakli
Takes a Sur in Indian Classical
Aye Butter Chakli, Bakarwadi, Diet Chivdaaaaa.

Now a girl in baby pink gives an eye
With her fish eyed dark eye liner
While giving a phone kiss to her boyfriend
Muaahhhhh
She moves her lips as I catch her red handed.

Train moves
Everyone looks at me at once
The hijada
The hawker
The lover
Like a criminal
Who waited for her lifetime
And still didn’t catch the train.